The Fridge Door

Click here for the on-line version.
 
April 2010

The Fridge Door is a miscellaneous collection of news and piffle sent out to folks who have, at some point, used Artography
to design a web site or at least enquired about such things. We try to keep it light hearted, not even remotely
politically correct and possibly a little off the wall. If you've got anything you'd like to see or want included - ask!


Competitive Web Mastering...

What blood and thunder is that you ask? Nothing much - a new phrase as much as anything. Well no, actually it's drawing together on and off site search optimisation.

Everyone has heard of Search Engine Optimisation (SEO) - we've all had the phone call, received the email or dipped our finger in the water one way or another. Some of us (no names) have even spent the money - usually with little effect. The truth is no one can guarantee results - that is a fact - believe it!

Search engine optimisation is, by definition, an on-site and on-page exercise and whilst that is vital, it's no longer enough. Google looks for links into (and out of) your site, you should be marketing your site and therefore yourself by getting word out at every opportunity. Are you using PR, article writing, blogs, and forums to promote your website, your company and your service? Is your business local, regional, national or global and does your website reflect this?

It's a competitive world - as we've all found out over the last couple of years. Your website is perhaps your single most cost effective marketing tool, it can also act as an advert and even a shop front but to make it work effectively you must promote it.

Promotion of a site is neither science nor art yet it is at the same time both! The science is to try something to see if it works, the art is predicting when your competitor changes strategy or the search engine changes the algorithm - and what to do about it! That is a full time job.

Competitive Web Mastering is bringing together all possible means to lift your website as high as possible on the search engines. It's optimising your pages for the right key phrases, it's generating links from directories, it's generating links from other sites, it's writing and registering articles, it's advising you on social networking, it's secondary sites and targeted pages. Our customised on and off site SEO service will specifically address your needs and challenges. We start with "cherry picked" improvements that will deliver the best initial return on investment.  Above all it's making your web site work as hard as possible for you...
...and it really does work! Call and see what we can do!
(Or watch this space for the new website - coming soon!)

New Stuff

Not a lot of new websites as such! Been spending more and more time on SEO and the Competitive Web Mastering - most of the new sites are really tied-in to existing client sites. We have spent a great deal of time recently on directory linking, article writing, in fact generally on "off-site" SEO and how to make it work!

It's a big subject! It's taken a lot of time but we've learnt so much! In fact not only have we learnt what does work but one hell of a lot about what doesn't work!  We've used it on our own sites and client sites both here in the UK, in Europe, in USA and even a few down under!

To impress you a little here a few new words we've had to learn:
SEM plan, competition analysis, site study, keyword research, activity reports, ranking checks, traffic analysis, flash redirect, meta tag creation, alt tag creation, anchor optimisation, article creation and optimisation, page content, landing page creation, H1 - H6 implementation, site map creation, HTML validation, RSS creation , XML site map, page analysis , article submission, blog submission, auto directory submission, manual directory submission, RSS submission, site map submission, contextual linking, deep linking, forum posting, image submission and Wikipedia page creation. It's been kinda scary but it's all come together at last!

Now we need to persuade you to start implementing it (then I can order my new Bentley)!

Politics, world affairs and other stuff...

Oh and once again we are off! The battle to see which bunch of buffoons will pretend to run the country for the next five years or so is under way!

Currently (and this may have changed by the time you get this) the favourites are the true blue stiff upper lipped Tories, creeping slowly away from the blue tinged, only slightly stiff upper lipped Socialists. Meanwhile and bringing up the rear are the sort of purple(ish) decidedly wobbly lipped Lib/Dems. Let's face it which ever lot finally wins will we REALLY be able to tell the difference? They are all going to have to make cuts and raise taxes to pay for bailing out the bankers (not bad - only one letter out!)  Who are they trying to kid with all this spin and rhetoric.

Never mind let's get on with it - Gordon Brown's fixed sickly grin that fools nobody. David Cameron wandering around without a tie and his sleeves rolled up pretending to be a man of the people. And of course the other one... Norman Clegg - or was that Last of the Summer Wine? Who knows, who cares? I suppose we all should but in reality will it make so much difference? (See - no word of expenses anywhere - I knew I could do it!)

Wot's the recipe today Jim?

Delia's Rhubarb and Ginger Brûlée
(Stolen from Waitrose - and I don't care!)

''Rhubarb is just coming into season and at its very best. I have to say that after 40 years of devising crumbles, tarts, trifles and other uses for rhubarb, this season's offering has narrowly - but positively - claimed the top spot. First of all, it's simple to make, and secondly it's perfect for serving either at an elegant supper or a special family Sunday lunch.''
Delia Smith from the Waitrose Website

I won't kid you - this is the real thing, just pick up the leaflet from your local Waitrose or get the recipe from the website and try it! I did - and will be doing it again soon, very soon....
Click here for the recipe or Try this site as the alternative

General Rubbish (or good advice?)

Someone had to remind me, so I'm telling you, too:
Perks of reaching 50, or being over 60 and heading toward 70!

  1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.
  2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.
  3. No-one expects you to run - anywhere.
  4. People call at 9pm and ask "Did I wake you?"
  5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.
  6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.
  7. Things you buy now won't wear out...
  8. You can eat supper at 4pm...
  9. You can live without sex, but not without your glasses.
  10. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
  11. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
  12. You sing along with elevator music.
  13. Your eyes won't get much worse.
  14. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.
  15. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the Met Office service.
  16. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.
  17. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.

Please forward this list to everyone you can remember, and finally:
NEVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TAKE A LAXATIVE THE SAME NIGHT AS A SLEEPING PILL !!

Growing old is not for wimps!

 

Puppy's Progress

Greetings! I'm Garla (pronounced "gala" like the apple). Please don't blame me for the name, I didn't choose it!  I'm a Guide Dog Puppy being trained to help a blind person live a near normal life at some point in the distant future.

I live with the humans who write this drivel and basically I'm a pretty normal pup! I do everything wrong, much like any puppy, get into scrapes, have "accidents" and hate going to the Vet person!

Apparently however one day I'm gonna be pretty special but until that happens, look out world! I've arrived! (Actually I arrived on Christmas Day which means it's gonna be difficult to forget my birthday!)

I live here in Reading with the humans and my two playmates Ruby - who is actually a sort of great aunt, and Kelly who's a rather elderly Golden Retriever. Until the other day I also had Jazz who was a real nutcase and we used to chase each other round the garden but she had to "go into training" - I don't know what that means except that she's gone away. It's kinda sad but apparently I'm getting a new playmate next week called Rory! For now however I'll have to behave! (it won't last!)
 
The picture below is Jazz and me playing.
Click here for even more pictures!

Laughter is Good Medicine

Lack of planning on your part does
not constitute an emergency on my part.
The road to success is always
under construction.
If at first you don't succeed,
avoid skydiving as a hobby.
If at first you do succeed,
try not to look surprised.
There's nothing like a little
experience to upset theory.
Blessed are the flexible, for they
shall not be bent out of shape.
Confidence is what you have when you
don't really understand the situation.
The squeaky wheel gets replaced.
Mondays are a terrible
way to start the week.
Work is the curse of the drinking class.

Happy Snapping!

What's been happening recently?
Click below for some clues:

Wolves of the Wolf Conservation Trust
See also: www.ukwolf.org
-o-
British Wildlife
See also: www.britishwildlifecentre.co.uk
-o-
Plus all the usual weddings etc!
Berkshire Weddings
Artography Weddings

The bottom line:   When you stop believing in Santa Claus is when you start getting clothes for Christmas.

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